Today is Holy Thursday.

And I’m reminded that Albuquerque, NM is home to the National Atomic Museum. Of the four atomic bombs created in Los Alamos, we dropped one just south of Albuquerque on July 16, 1945. We dropped a second on Hiroshima and a third on Nagasaki. The casing of the fourth still lives at the museum.

Isn’t it telling, and suspiciously more than interesting, that the basic building block of our entire universe is what we call the atom? And that the atom at its most simple definition and functional understanding is the orbiting structure of three particles – proton, electron, and neutron – in constant interplay with one another.

The further irony, still, is that Robert Oppenheimer, the “father of the atom bomb,” named the final stage and site of its New Mexico detonation Trinity. He late said that although this clear choice of name was not completely conscious to him, it was probably inspired, to some degree, by John Donne’s metaphysical poem “Holy Sonnet #14.”

Donne’s meditation invokes a kind of trinity. But is it the same Trinity we talk about in church? I can’t say for certain. But I can say I find this poem both beautiful and disturbing all at the same time:

What contrasting images!

As one museum dedicated to science and art notes in their reflection piece on the Trinity test site:

“Holy Sonnet #14” begins, “Batter my heart three-person’d God….” In that sonnet, the speaker addresses God directly and strong paradoxical emotions surface, all in context of an extended warlike metaphor. Coursing through the poetry is violent imagery (”batter my heart,” “overthrow me,” “break, blow, burn…”) paired with pleas to be healed and renewed (“seek to mend,” “make me new”), evoking an internal struggle of war (The Exploratorium in San Francisco).

When Oppenheimer was creating his bomb at Los Alamos, we were at war—as we often are. And it seems that he himself was locked in an internal battle, hoping—praying even?—that an instrument of death-dealing could somehow bring life. That an army, prepared to “usurp” towns themselves and institute martial law, could bring peace at home and abroad with their powers of annihilation.

But Oppenheimer wasn’t blind to the irony nor the consequences of his actions. It seems he feared that in breaking open the atom, they had enacted an undoing or reversal of the very fabric of reality, destabilizing the tripartite source code of life itself (and spiritual life it seems as well). It’s no wonder that, upon witnessing the bomb’s awful blast, Oppenheimer immediately invoked the Hindu diety Vishnu, quoting from the Bhagavad Gita, “Now I am become death, the destroyer of worlds.”

We must grapple with the truth that our imagination, when applied to both worlds “above” and “below,” can be used for such potent life and death. This is part of the mystery of freedom that God grants us. We mustn’t ignore the fact that this mystery of exploding power is not found in the protons. It’s not found in the neutrons. Nor is it found in the electrons.

The explosive power is found in the interactions between them.

It’s Holy Thursday and is seems Jesus was aware of the power in relationship. Upon entering Jerusalem he celebrated the Passover. A Jewish ceremony meant to commemorate the Hebrew people no longer being in an abusive, one-sided relationship with a paranoid, power-hungry Pharoah. Celebrating Passover was about celebrating that once freed from Egypt the Hebrew people were led, accompanied by God, to the wilderness where they would need to be in community—in relationship—in a new way.

Not only does Jesus celebrate the Passover on Holy Thursday, but he institutes the Lord’s Supper. And, according to John’s Gospel, Jesus offers the commandment, “Love one another as I have loved you.”

Jesus got it! The explosive power that can make or break the world, that can build up or tear down, that can develop or destroy the kingdom of God is found in the relationships between us. So he says, “take, eat, this is my body given for… YOU!” As you “eat my flesh”—can you think of anything more relational and intimate?!—know that we have the power to build one another up… but also the power to tear one another down.

Jesus wants to be in relationship with you, so that you can then be in truer relationship with others.

It’s Holy Thursday. As you journey nearer to the cross, as you celebrate the Lord’s Supper, as you prepare yourself for the passion that comes on Good Friday… may you come to a deeper awareness that you have an atomic-like power coursing through your very being. And when used appropriately you can ignite this world in love. The journey is set before you. The way is frightening. But the reward is great.